Preparing for CHRISTmas

I had been busy mind storming about possible family bonding activities for the Christmas season. I checked the internet for suggestions on what families can do together to make the “holy days” memorable but nothing seemed to excite me from the options I have seen. We already visited Casa Santa and had our pictures taken with a live Santa Claus last year. We have already watched the C.O.D. or Christmas on display in Greenhills as a way of continuing the family tradition my parents started when my younger brother and I were still kids. We have toured around Makati to marvel at its Christmas lights display. We have shopped together for gifts for our extended family members. What else can we do? I continued my Christmas shopping and bought some of our needed grocery for Noche Buena while I continued to be open to possibilities.


Then, I got my biggest surprise this Christmas when I was asked to organize the Simbang Gabi for our condominium community four days before it started. I learned that our Liturgical Committee Head was already busy preparing for his overseas assignment soon and begged off from the responsibility of organizing and overseeing the preparation. Being his assistant, the responsibility landed on my lap. I initially thought that the task wouldn’t be very difficult since there are other members of the Liturgical Committee and there are cluster representatives in the different buildings in our community. But I was wrong. I found out in the course of the preparation and coordination that there were only three reliable members of the Liturgical Committee. And that included me, a lay minister and our head. Since our head was busy with his work commitments, he only committed to provide the music by playing the keyboards. I was already very happy with that. At least, finding a musician was one task off my very long to-do list. The lay minister, although very knowledgeable with the requirements for the Holy Mass, relied more on me to mobilize and coordinate with people and to provide the other items or requirements for the Mass.

It was very stressful especially in the beginning because I had to do almost everything and I had to move from one place to another during the mass because no one else volunteered or was familiar with the parts of the mass. There were only a few cluster representatives who responded to my text messages and calls when I coordinated. Out of the many representatives, I think less than 10 percent responded and much lesser are those who responded positively. A lot of times during the first few days of the Simbang Gabi, I wasn’t sure who was going to be the readers, offertory ushers, fruit or grocery basket donors or choir. Every night, I kept praying to God that He would touch and move hearts and that He would send other volunteers who would help me organize the Simbang Gabi. Then, slowly each night, God sent one or two more volunteers until it came to a point that I didn’t have to be the only commentator. I thank God that there was another woman who volunteered. This development enabled me to focus on other tasks/roles that needed to be done/filled during the mass like ensuring that the symbolic offering every night for the Christmas Novena would be in order and that those assigned to offer would not forget to bring what they are supposed to bring and walk at the right moment. That the offertory procession would be in order and that there are people chosen to carry the love offering baskets, water, wine and host and that they are carried in the right order at the right time. That there would be Power Point slides used to project the Responsorial Psalm, Christmas Novena, Prayers of the Faithful and the songs for the Mass and that there would be someone who would operate the computer and the lcd projector. That the contents of the mass kit are complete and ready for use, etc. etc.

I remember there was a night when our resident musician could not make it to play the keyboards for the mass and George was not sure if he can make it because of work concerns as well. I had to gather recorded mass songs so that we’d still have music during the Simbang Gabi. Thank God someone volunteered to be commentator that night because I needed to be the one who would operate the computer and lcd projector and assist the technical assistant in playing the songs.

I experienced so many challenges preparing for the Simbang Gabi but the miracles I witnessed each night were so much more. The first miracle I witnessed was the very big turnout of mass-goers. The chairs were not enough since day 1 because those who attended the Simbang Gabi in our clubhouse were always more than a hundred. In fact, on the first night and on the last night of the Simbang Gabi, the attendees were more than doubled because our clubhouse was filled with people up to the second floor. The second miracle was that I always get surprised with the turnout of donors for the fruit or grocery basket. There were days when no one has committed or pledged to donate and I would just pray to God that He would move my neighbours to be generous. And then I noticed that it was during those nights when I wasn’t certain if someone would donate or offer a basket that we had the most fruit/grocery baskets offered. Amazing! There was also a night when no one confirmed among those I texted until around an hour before the Mass. A neighbour who was supposed to donate and offer during the weekend but did not make it called me and told me she will donate and offer that night. What perfect timing! It was only then that I realized why she was not able to attend and offer during the weekend. It was because she was appointed by God to offer that night when no one else would donate and offer except her. The third miracle I witnessed was the raising up of new volunteers among the residents of our community. One by one, some neighbours eventually approached me and volunteered to help in their own small way. We still have a very small group of volunteers for our liturgical services but it’s better than not having any volunteer at all. I continue to hope and pray that God would send more laborers into the harvest for the harvest is great but the laborers in our community are few. The fourth miracle I witnessed was when our next door neighbour who rarely went to Mass attended our Simbang Gabi and they even agreed to carry the wine and host in one of the Masses. And then I wondered… Could it be that some of our neighbours are like them who are not regular churchgoers but because the Mass was already in the comforts of our clubhouse, they have chosen to attend? Possible! And with that realization, I grew in conviction to endure the hardships, challenges and inconveniences of organizing the Simbang Gabi.

The fifth miracle I got was the answer to my question and search at the start of the Advent season. I realized while preparing for the Simbang Gabi that this was the family bonding activity God wanted me and my family to share this Christmas. I discovered that this was the first time my husband was able to complete the Christmas 9 Day Novena Masses. And his experience was made more memorable because he was not only a spectator or regular attendee but he had some active participation and specific roles in some of the Masses because I needed his help and there weren’t many servants/volunteers who can help me. Most of the time, he was part of the music ministry and he was helping out Yanthy with the symbolic offering. Our 2 year old son, Yanthy, was able to attend the Simbang Gabi for the first time this year because it was held in our own clubhouse and it was held in the evening when he was still awake. He even played a special part because of the symbolic offerings which are part of the Rogationists’ way of having the Simbang Gabi. It was also very meaningful and memorable for our family especially for Yanthy because he lent his things to the Baby Jesus in the manger. Since I was the one organizing and only a couple of residents volunteered to provide the symbolic offerings, a number of the things offered in the manger are Yanthy’s things. I was very happy that Yanthy was involved somehow in preparing for Jesus’ birth. I saw how eager he was to lend Baby Jesus his baby pillow, baby clothes and toy drum. I was glad to see my son happy to offer his own things so that the Baby Jesus would have something to “use.” It was a delight to see and hear my toddler son sing liturgical and Christmas songs during the Mass. It was a fulfilment of my dream; that one day when I have my own family, we will be one household serving the Lord. I only hoped and prayed for something nice that our family could do and experience together this Christmas but God surprised me and exceeded my expectations by giving us this amazing and unforgettable experience of the first ever Simbang Gabi in our condominium community. These are just some of the many miracles I witnessed as I organized the Simbang Gabi. There’s so much more but I am at a loss for words right now. I just can’t help but marvel and be awed at God’s amazing hand.

It was an exhausting and challenging 9 days but if I would be asked to do it again, I would still say yes. The Simbang Gabi experience did not only help me and my family prepare our hearts for the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ. It also helped many residents in our community prepare their hearts for Jesus. It was an honor and a privilege to be God’s instrument and to be like St. John the Baptist to our neighbours. As I end this reflection and sharing, let me share part of the homily of Fr. Tim, one of the priests who celebrated the Simbang Gabi with us. He said that God needs people like Mary who are willing to make a sacrifice so that others would experience His Love. His words struck me because God called me to make a sacrifice this Christmas so He could use me to organize the Simbang Gabi which would bless a lot of people. I wasn’t stressed much because of the Christmas shopping because I started early. It was only later that I realized why God moved me to do this early. It was because He was going to give me another assignment. What stressed me was the day by day preparations for the Simbang Gabi when a lot of the things we needed were provided sometimes literally at the last minute. But it also paved the way for me to witness God’s faithfulness and amazing grace. Then I realized, it was not only me who made a sacrifice but also my family because we were exhausted during the Simbang Gabi because of the preparations and coordinations and we slept late most of the time including Yanthy. We were not able to prepare much food also for our Noche Buena because I didn’t have much energy anymore to cook a number of dishes. I simply prepared a pasta, salad and soup dish. Moreover, although we were able to shop for gifts for other people and for Yanthy, my husband and I were not able to spend ample time searching and buying gifts for each other. We were not able to go out also to have a date on our wedding anniversary because we needed to serve in the Simbang Gabi. We simply had lunch as a family in a restaurant and offered a fruit basket and a copy of my book during the Mass. But as we reflected on our Simbang gabi experience on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, we realized that what we have experienced as a family this year is what is essential. That’s what really Christmas is all about. It’s all about Christ and about being Christ to others. I’m blessed to have given Jesus Christ -- the real reason for our celebration -- the gift of myself. And I’m doubly blessed to have received Him in my heart as the most precious Christmas gift I have received this year.

Wanted: Story Teller

I’ve been meaning to write a reflection right after my husband and I attended the Kerygma Conference last November but I simply couldn’t find the time. Now, I know why. God wanted me to experience the insights I gained from the conference more powerfully. He gave me that opportunity last Tuesday when I was invited to speak on Love and Sexuality to more than 500 first year college students at a university in Manila.

I was deeply moved by the talk given by Bro. Bo Sanchez during the Leadership Track of the Kerygma Conference last November. He began his talk by removing his shoes. Then he said that he doesn’t claim to be better, more holy or more spiritual than anybody present in that room. He believes though that the reason he is where he is right now and he is doing what he is doing right now, which is to preach and lead a big community like Light of Jesus (LOJ), is because God simply WANTED him to serve Him in that way. Then, he said that maybe some of us present in that Leadership Track might be wondering why we’re attending that track. He said that there is only one reason... God wanted us to be there! We are all leaders in one way or another because God wanted to use us. It’s not because we are good or we are the best at what we do. It’s not because we earned our positions. It’s not because we deserved to be where we are. It’s all grace! God chose us simply because He wanted us to serve Him by being leaders and role models in our respective circles of influence.

I grew to appreciate these truths and insights more powerfully when I shared my story to college freshmen last Tuesday morning. I felt that I didn’t have enough time to prepare for my presentation. I was out the whole weekend with my family before my talk and I only had the day before the scheduled event to prepare my material. With this feeling of inadequacy, I came before God in prayer last Monday morning. I told God how I felt and I asked Him to grant me the grace of His humble wisdom so I could speak the right words to the youth who will be listening to me. God led me to reflect on the readings for the day of my talk.

Let me quote the lines that struck me from the readings.

“Comfort, give comfort to my people, says your God. Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her service is at an end, her guilt is expiated; Indeed, she has received from the hand of the Lord double for all her sins.”“Go up onto a high mountain, Zion, herald of glad tidings; Cry out at the top of your voice, Jerusalem, herald of good news! Fear not to cry out and say to the cities of Judah: Here is your God! Here comes with power the Lord God, who rules by his strong arm; Here is his reward with him, his recompense before him. Like a shepherd he feeds his flock; in his arms he gathers the lambs, carrying them in his bosom, and leading the ewes with care.” (Isaiah 40:1-2, 9-11)

“Sing to the Lord a new song; Sing to the Lord, all the earth. Sing to the Lord, bless his name; announce his salvation day after day. Tell God’s glory among the nations; among all peoples, God’s marvellous deeds.” (Psalm 96:1-3.)

And finally from the Gospel according to Matthew 18:12-14.“What is your opinion? If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hills and go in search of the astray? And if he finds it, amen, I say to you, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that did not stray. In just the same way, it is not the will of your heavenly Father that one of these little ones be lost.”

I was amazed! I felt God’s affirmation that He really wanted me to speak to the youth the following day. He was sending me to proclaim the Good News to them by sharing my story. He wanted me to testify about His goodness and faithfulness in my life. He wanted me to join Him in seeking His lost little ones and to help bring them back to His fold. What an honor and a privilege! He chose my story out of countless love stories. Why? Well, I think it’s because my story is just like any ordinary girl’s story. What made it extraordinary was God’s amazing involvement in carrying out His perfect plan for my life. I was confident that God would bless my efforts in preparing for the event. I was confident that whatever is lacking in my presentation, God would supply so that His purpose would be fulfilled. I may not be the best preacher, speaker or story teller but He chose me. He has anointed me. I know that He would enable me. I also agree with my husband when he said that one reason God puts me in situations where I feel that I am not prepared or adequate is because he wants me to rely on His grace to deliver and fulfil His purposes. So that when things turn out well, I would not credit that to myself but to God’s grace and power.

True enough, God blessed the symposium where I spoke and shared my story as a single lady making the most of my season of singleness and of course my love story, how God fulfilled His promise to me of giving me a godly helpmate.

As I pondered on the events of that day during my time of prayer that same night, I couldn’t help but be awed. I realized that even if there was only one student or little one who needed to find his/her way back to God, God would still organize a symposium just for that person. And so I thought, that even if there was only one student who was moved and inspired by my story, my story would still be worth telling because of the value that our Father gives to each one of us. I may not know the extent of my influence last Tuesday but I’m certain that God’s purpose has been fulfilled. I know that by sharing my life and love story, those students were given an alternative on how to live their single lives. They were given an opportunity to make a choice – to involve God or not in their lives, be it in their academics, future career or love life. I can only pray that they would also choose to let God be God in every aspect of their lives.

I also realized that every opportunity that God gives me to share my life and love story is God’s way of blessing me. Yes, He’s using me to bless others who listen to me. But, they are not the only ones blessed. He blesses me as well! How? First, He blesses me by reminding me of the wonders He has done in my life. How can I forget God’s great love, mercy and faithfulness to me if I keep on telling people about His works in my life? How can I not go on even amidst trials and difficulties when I am reminded constantly that I have a powerful God who moves mountains, who makes walls collapse and who makes the impossible possible? Second, He blesses me by helping me grow in appreciation of my husband. Every time I tell our love story, I am reminded of the reasons why I chose to marry this man. God strengthens our marriage and my commitment to my husband every time I share our love story. Third, I am reminded that I am blessed to have a child and to be a full time mother at this time of my life. I am reminded that all these were made possible by God because He loves me very much and He wants to give me only the best.

My heart is bursting with joy! I feel that through that experience God gave me back the fervour of my first love. I’m just so in love with Him again! And I commit to testify to His goodness, faithfulness and love for as long as I shall live not only with my words but most importantly with the life that I live. Just as Bro. Pio Español said in his talk during the Leadership Track of the Kerygma Conference, the world needs role models more than great preachers. People can forget what you say in your talks or presentations but they will not forget your legacy. How you live your life is more important than how you deliver your lines during your talks or presentations. That is what I strive for – that by the choices that I make and the life that I live people will know that God reigns in my life and that I’m an ardent lover and follower of Jesus.

Bonding Times and Play Time Favorites

I have just finished reading a parenting magazine and I can’t help but be grateful to be reminded by the editor and their invited pediatrician about certain truths on parenting and spending quality time with our kids. What struck me the most is a line from the developmental pediatrician who said, “Your physical and emotional availability are what really matter to your child.” I also agree with the editor mom when she said that a child need not have too many toys to be happy. Just like what the paediatrician said, it’s not really toys that make our children happy. What really make our children happy are the quality times we spend with them playing together, laughing over stories or silly moments, sharing both regular and special family bonding moments and the like. These thoughts led me to look back at the regular bonding times I spend with my toddler son and I discovered that many of the things my two-year-old boy loves doing with me or with his Dad do not require fancy toys. The truth is, our little boy finds so much joy not so much in his toys that we sometimes use during our play time but more importantly on the fact that we take time to play with him or spend quality time with him. His toys are there to simply add fun to our time together or to be instruments in making our time together extra special.

Here is a list of Yanthy’s favorite daily activities with me or his Dad or with both of us:

1. Tickle Time and Funny Bones – Yanthy loved tickle time ever since he’s a baby. Lately, he’s the one who initiates it. He likes to be tickled and he likes to sneak in and tickle us in our bed, sofa or wherever we are. We started playing funny bones when we first taught him his body parts. We reinforced his new learnings by playing this game and it has stuck with him since then.

2. Playing Hide and Seek – This is a game we loved playing since he was a baby. He’d giggle a lot while playing this game and we have incorporated counting which made it also educational.

3. Running around – Yanthy loved running since he was around 7 to 8 months old. He runs tirelessly all day around the bedroom, house or our compound. When I can no longer run with him (because I get tired much faster), I just watch him on the sidelines and remind him to be careful so he doesn’t get hurt. He had his share of falls and scratches but he remains unfazed whenever given the opportunity to run.

4. Singing and Playing Musical Instruments – Yanthy likes music very much. We spend most of our day with music in the background. He tells me when he wants to listen to music and he would ask me to turn our stereo on. Sometimes, I would just see him trying to turn it on himself. Then, while listening to music or singing songs, we would play one or two musical instruments like his drum, xylophone or maracas. At other times, we play the piano. Yanthy loves listening to the sounds that he makes as he playfully strikes the piano keys. When we are not dancing and playing instruments while listening to music, we draw, color or play with his other toys. In my experience, songs have helped Yanthy increase his vocabulary and sharpen his listening skills. He has actually become so good in listening that we sometimes play name the next song. It was also through this activity that I have discovered that my son is music-smart.

5. Dancing – With music in the background, dancing is not far behind. Yanthy loves to dance and jump whenever he hears fast tunes. Then, we do the actions while singing when we hear action songs. This is one of the things I love doing with Yanthy the most. It also serves as one of the ways I exercise.

6. Playing Make Believe – I noticed that Yanthy has good imagination when he was still a baby playing alone on his crib. These days, he gets to articulate his imagination because he can already talk and he shares with me what he imagines. Yesterday, he turned his clothes hamper into a boat. He dumped his toys inside and he sat inside it. Then, I asked him where he’s bringing his boat. He said, “California!” Sometimes, he plays with his car or airplane and he says he will go to Surigao to visit his grandparents. There are also times when he gets some of his Dad’s things and he would act as if he’s going to his Dad’s office to work. It’s fun watching him playing pretend.

7. Playing with Building Blocks or Stacking Cups – We started playing this game before he turned one year old and he is still hooked until now. He loves building towers with his blocks and he takes pride whenever he finishes a tower. I saw how he grew in confidence and patience by playing with these toys. These are very simple and inexpensive toys but they can teach a lot to a child.

8. Reading or Storytelling – A day never passed that we did not read at least one book. He likes to sit on my lap while listening to me. I read the Bible with him when he’s already awake during my morning prayer time. During the day, we read storybooks or books on the alphabet, numbers, shapes or colors. Sometimes, we read his songbook while listening to music or while singing nursery songs. At other times, I use finger puppets or hand puppets while telling him a story. Reading and storytelling has helped a lot in instilling the love for books in our son. When he’s not busy running or climbing something at home, he’s usually busy reading a book or listening to me read him a book. He loves hearing stories so much. He has actually memorized some of his books including his book that we read to him at bedtime. He has also memorized some of the lines of the characters in the story like in the story of the three little pigs. Yanthy also learned to tell his own stories through these activities. You can ask him a story about one of the books we have read or a movie that we saw and he would tell you what happened in the story. With my son’s love for books at an early age, I’m confident that he will grow to be a learner and that he would find much inspiration growing up.

9. Swimming – Most kids love to play in the water and Yanthy is no exception. We exposed him early to swimming even before he turned one year old and he learned to swim without formal lessons before he turned two. This is one of his bonding activities with his Dad because my husband is the one who teaches him how to swim. My role here is cheerleader since I have not learned how to swim until now. This also serves as my husband’s exercise whenever he swims with Yanthy. We plan to enrol him next summer for formal swimming lessons.

10. Drawing or Coloring – I like this activity very much because I love to draw. Actually, I love anything related to the arts. In the beginning, Yanthy just loves to watch me draw. Then, he started to doodle. Now, he loves crayons and he loves using them not just on paper but even on different surfaces (like our walls, floor, and furniture including his high chair).One thing that I noticed and which was also pointed out by the pediatrician in the magazine is that kids spend more time playing with something or they complete an activity when parents take an active part in the activity. I’ve observed this in my own son. When he knows that I’m beside him while he’s doing something like coloring, doodling or building towers, he spends more time on the activity. But when he sees me doing something else, he gets impatient easily or he stops what he’s doing and he goes to me.

I’ve realized that these simple activities that we do together send positive messages to my son or teaches him valuable life lessons. Like when he’s trying to build a tower and the blocks fall and crash the entire structure he has built, he knows that I am there to comfort or encourage him or to help him rebuild it if he wants me to help him. He can bring this principle with him as he grows and starts to set goals for himself. He would know that his parents will be there to help him or give him emotional support. Pretend play can also lay the foundation for him to weave dreams for himself that’s why I encourage him to imagine. It also teaches him resourcefulness and thinking out-of-the-box. In life, he will not have everything he wants but resourcefulness and thinking out-of-the-box would enable him to make the most of what he has and use them to bring him to where he wants to go. And as we enjoy other activities, he can learn that he has family members who share his joys and supports him in discovering and developing his gifts.

I thank God for this opportunity to be reminded that the best gift I can give my son is my time and undivided attention. It can be very challenging especially for working moms but it’s possible. We simply need to be committed in making quality time with our families a priority and to be reminded of this commitment from time to time.