(Warning: This is a long and detailed post about our school visits.)
My
eldest son and I visited two schools within our village last Tuesday. I’ve been
considering putting him in a brick-and-mortar school more seriously
since I started having a difficult pregnancy with my third child. I was in bed
most of the time in the past two months or so (hence my silence/absence here in
the blog) that I felt I could not continue homeschooling him.
I
barely had energy in the past months to do even the littlest of things. I was
throwing up a number of times in a day (from morning until evening). I felt
drained.
Thus,
it was only around last week when I had the energy to check out schools near
our area through the internet. After reading LOTS of posts in the internet
about searching for schools for young children in our area, I’ve decided to
check out those that are nearest our place of residence.
Location
is a big factor for me. I’m not willing to delegate to strangers the
responsibility of keeping my son safe while he travels to school. At five years
old, I still think and feel that it should either be me or my husband who should
bring him to school and fetch him from there. I don’t want to hire a school service
or entrust him to a maid. School buses do not have car seats installed for
young children. Most do not even have lap or seat belts. Also, it’s so HARD to
find reliable/trustworthy maids these days. But even if I find a really good
maid one day, I still want to be the one to bring my young children to school
(if they will go to a brick-and-mortar school). I want that to be part of their
childhood memory.
And
so after calling one of the schools within our village, Yanthy and I visited it
the following day. I asked him first if he wants to check out the school
nearby. He said yes. So, the following day, we headed to the school to observe
their first day of class and to check out the environment and facilities.
I
read two positive feedbacks about the first school we visited from other parents
through the internet. The school claims to be a progressive preschool. The
directress/owner said during our phone conversation that they employ a
combination of traditional and progressive approach in teaching their students.
She said they are still traditional because they use worksheets in their
programs and they give homework to students twice a week. They are progressive
she said because they try to follow the kids’ interests in discussing topics
which are part of their program. They also do not give tests and they only have
a maximum of 10 students per class. The length of the class is only three (3)
hours for both Kinder and Prep. I also asked for the tuition fee. She said that
it’s P55,000 per year including books and other materials. I also asked if they
had previous experience in teaching or handling kids with special needs. She
said yes but admitted that there were only a few. She was honest to say that
she and her teachers do not have training on SPED and that what they know was
simply based on their limited experience with a few students in the past. I
asked this because my son is a potentially gifted child and has traits and
behaviors which are not typical of other kids his age.
Anyway,
since the school sounds promising and the tuition is within an acceptable range
for me, I still decided to push through with our school visit the following
day. And I’m so glad I did and that I brought my child with me for him to
participate in some activities.
Here
are the things that I’ve observed while in the school:
PROS:
1. There’s a waiting area outside the school’s main building
where fetchers like parents or nannies can wait.
2. The interiors of the school looked appealing to kids.
There are nice murals and the rooms are brightly painted. There is a spacious and
padded indoor play area for kids. There are plenty of toys to play with and
they are plenty enough to share with other kids. There’s also a bookshelf with
a number of books to choose from at the play area. Aside from the indoor play
area, there is an outside play area as well. There are separate rooms for each
level (nursery, junior kinder, senior kinder and prep) and each room including
the indoor play area is air conditioned.
3. Aside from main teachers, there were also teacher aids
present.
4. Each class size is small enough to encourage and facilitate
involvement of the students.
5. I noticed that there were at least two washrooms in the
school for the kids to use.
CONS:
1. The main gate of the school was left open and I did not
see a guard at the gate.
2. When we arrived, I noticed a small boy who kept on walking
around the school premises while crying. He was moving from one room to another
and around the play area. He kept on crying for at least 30 minutes and my
heart really went out to the little boy. I was disappointed by the lack of
attention given by both teachers and teacher aids. They just let the kid cry
out while attending to the other kids in their class. This went on until one of
the main teachers called all the kids to join the big circle time to officially
start their first day in school this school year. The poor boy just kept crying
until a number of songs were sang during the circle time and the students went
to their respective classrooms. I believe that if the main teachers cannot
attend to the little boy, one of them should have instructed a teacher aid to
take care of him to comfort him, ask him what he wants and to bring him to
another room or outside so as not to distract the other students. I did not see
that happen though. The main teacher who took charge of the big circle time
eventually carried the poor boy with her as she instructed the Senior Kinder
and Prep students to go up their classroom but it really took a while before
she and her teacher aid paid attention to the boy. I noticed also that there
was no compassion in her tone of voice as she asked the little boy what he
wanted and why he kept on crying.
3. The next thing I noticed that I didn’t like was the way
the teacher who took charge of the big circle time talked to the students. Young
children’s attention naturally wanders and so there are times when some kids
look elsewhere instead of looking in front at the teacher. Some kids would
sometimes face other kids sitting next to them either beside them or behind
them. I think that it’s alright for the teacher to call their attention and to
gently remind them of what they should be doing. But I did not hear gentleness in
the teacher’s voice when she did this a number of times and she didn’t even use
kind words. She simply called out each student by name in a tone that is beyond
being firm and almost angry. She didn’t say “please” as she tells the kids to
sit properly and to face front. She sounded like someone commanding soldiers
who are lined up in front of her. I have observed and overheard my son’s
occupational therapists give firm commands or instructions to my son during his
occupational therapy sessions in the past years but they didn’t sound anything
like her, considering that my son is strong-willed and would not easily obey
without much reasoning and persuasion.
The most disappointing action that I noticed from this
teacher was when she was already in the classroom with the Senior Kinder and
the Prep students. While she’s writing some sentences on the white board, a
child who seems to be a special child was playing around their classroom.
Suddenly, the child reached out to the teacher’s bag wanting to touch it. The
teacher saw it and readily reacted. Her reaction truly surprised me! She
pointed a finger angrily to the special child as she said, “Don’t touch my bag!”
She didn’t have to point a finger on the child’s face. She didn’t have to use
that angry tone of voice especially that she’s dealing with a special child.
She could have said “Please, do not touch teacher’s bag, (and then state the
name of the child).”
Before they went to the classroom, she even reminded the
kids to use kind and gentle words to each other, to say “please” and “thank you”,
and to use loving hands when interacting with each other. She did not set a
good example for the kids to follow. It was a good thing that I asked
permission from the directress to observe her class so I would know if my son
is participating. I was looking through a glass window on the upper portion of
the door to their classroom when I saw this happen.
4. I was surprised when I witnessed one of the teachers
command her students who were lined up to put their hands together behind them.
Then, they were asked to march to their classroom. I didn’t understand why she
had to ask them to walk that way -- like criminals with their hands on a
handcuff on their backs. Why not ask them to walk with their arms swinging
freely on their sides (which is the natural way to walk) or why not ask the
kids to clap while singing a happy song and marching to their classroom? Isn’t that
more fun to do for the small kids? I think it was the nursery class that walked
to their classroom that way. I thought as I saw that happen before me, “I don’t
want my kids to behave or to be treated like prisoners.”
5. My son didn’t want to participate during the big circle
time as the teacher led the kids in singing nursery songs and doing some
actions. He was simply looking around. He knew the songs, understood the
instructions, and can definitely follow the actions but he chose not to. The
directress noticed it too. This made her comment if it’s possible that my son
feels that singing these songs were too basic for him. I said that’s possible
because he has mastered most nursery songs while he was only two years old. He
could even guess the song by simply listening to the first few notes in the
intro.
When
the teacher in charge of the Senior Kinder and the Prep students announced that
it’s time for snack and that they should go to the washroom to wash their hands
first, I took that as a cue for me to leave with my son. I thanked the
directress for her time and patience answering my questions and bid her
goodbye.
My
son and I went to a nearby convenience store to have our afternoon snack. Over
snack, I asked him what he liked in the school and why he didn’t participate during
the big circle time. He said that he liked the school because there’s a play
area and he liked the toys there. He actually wanted to go back to play some
more. I tried to probe some more if there was anything else he liked aside from
what he mentioned but he kept raving about the toys and the play area. Then, I
asked him why he didn’t sing with the teacher and the other kids or imitate
the actions. His reply helped me understand my son better. He said, “I don’t
know her name.” He was referring to the teacher. I realized that relationship
is important to my son and that even if he knows the answer or the actions, he
will not answer, talk or move if he doesn’t know the person asking him. I was
reminded of the times when some people whom he doesn’t see often or whom he has
seen only once or twice asked him some questions and he just stared and kept
quiet.
I
also remember some of the articles I read about some gifted kids who feel
overwhelmed when placed in a big group of people. This could be because of
their hypersensitivity to the things around them. Some gifted kids withdraw
because they have too much to process. I noticed this in some children’s
parties that we attended where my son refused to participate in some of the
games. However, when he becomes accustomed to the place and become familiar
with the people there, he eventually learns to become comfortable. He also gets
easily distracted when there are too many kids in the group like when he joined
a soccer class one summer. Incidentally, there were at least 20 kids in the
room during the big circle time because all the kids from the different levels
were asked to join.
Another
thing that I found out from the directress when we visited the school was that
they were non-sectarian. I was hoping that they were at least Christian and
that they taught basic Christian teachings. Sadly, they are not.
After
our snack, we walked to the next school. I was not able to call this school
ahead of our visit but the owner was gracious enough to accommodate us and
answer my questions. She even asked a teacher aid to watch over my boy who
wanted to play in their swing while I talked to her. She said that they also
use both the traditional and progressive approach in teaching their students
but upon further probing, I found out that they were really more traditional.
They give plenty of worksheets and use books that look like workbooks. They
give homework every day. They also give quarterly exams. When I asked her to
describe the schedule and activities of those in Prep (my son is considered
Prep because of his age for this school and the first school we visited), she
said that there’s only 10 minute circle time and then there’s seatwork and
board work until snack time. Then, seatwork and board work will continue until
dismissal. She said that they need to stretch the attention span of the prep
students to prepare them for big school where the schedule is usually 7 AM to 2
PM for Grade 1. I asked if they try to insert art or music activities in
between and she said every now and then. But I doubt how often these are since
her reply of seatwork and board work was more automatic. I think the main reason
she claimed they are a progressive school is because they only accept a maximum
of 18 students per class. She also mentioned that when they notice that there
are kids who are advanced or kids who lag behind, they try to give extra
attention to these kids by giving an extra book to read or study or by giving free tutorial once a month. I
asked her to describe or walk me through the topics or areas covered in the
different levels to give me an idea of what they cover in the school year. I
noticed that they were demanding even at the lower levels of what children
should already know than the first school we visited. They also expect the kids
to answer a lot of material in writing. But just like the first school, they
base the level of the kid on his biological age, although she said that they
also assess the kids through a test. The tuition fee in this school is much
lower, only P28,000 excluding books, uniform and supplies.
Let
me share some of my observations while my son and I were in this second school:
PROS:
1. The gate was closed when we arrived so we had to use the
doorbell. It was closed right away by one of the school’s staff as soon as we
entered.
2. The classrooms were also painted bright colors and air
conditioned. But it seemed to me that the air conditioning is not enough for
the size of the classrooms.
3. The teacher that I observed was amiable. She used a
friendly voice and whenever she had to call the attention of any of her
students, she did it in a respectful, gentle and loving manner. The kids would
not feel embarrassed by her choice of words or her tone of voice. Very different
from the teacher that I observed in the first school. No wonder, the owner was
proud to share with me that their all their teachers have worked with them for
at least 20 years.
CONS:
1. The school didn’t have an indoor play area. The owner
also said that they don’t have toys anymore in the school premises. They only
have two swings in their small front yard.
2. There were only two classrooms and to go the second classroom,
you need to pass by the first classroom. The rooms are only separated by a
wooden door.
3. I noticed photos of children in Halloween costumes on
their bulletin board. I saw this while the owner was showing me the activities
that they have year-round. I asked if they have field trips and she said that
they don’t have any. Just small and simple events. She said that field trips
can be too tiring for small kids. My family and I celebrate All Saints’ Day
differently and we like to teach our kids the real reason for this celebration.
We don’t like the commercialized or unchristian ways of celebrating it. We want
to bring back the focus to the holy ones or the saints.
Just
like the first school, they are also non-sectarian. The owner said that they
don’t do the sign of the cross when leading the kids into prayer before meals.
I asked if Catholic kids are prohibited from doing the sign of the cross when
they pray and she said that they are not prohibited but not encouraged. She
said that they didn’t want to offend other students from other denominations.
What’s my verdict?
First,
these two schools do not fit my criteria for the school where I want my young children
to get their early education. Second, homeschooling my kids at this age and
stage of their lives is still our best option. Third, I realized (thank God for
the insight!) that I am still the best teacher for my son at this stage of his
life.
My
most important requirement in choosing a school for early childhood education
for my kids is the values that they teach and stand for. I prefer a Catholic
school or at least a Christian school that teaches Christian values and teaches
the kids about the Bible. I want my kids’ spirituality to be the center of
their lives. I don’t want them to compartmentalize their spirituality. I want
them to base their decisions on their spiritual beliefs. I want to them to get
used to living a life of prayer from a young age. I want them to be aware that
God is with them wherever they are and that they are encouraged to practice
their Christian or Catholic faith as openly and as often as they can. Putting
them in a non-sectarian school for me is like taking God out of their school
life. There’s no reminder about God's presence in the schools we visited . There is
no crucifix at least. If I choose to put my kids in a brick-and-mortar school
eventually, I want their school environment to give them reminders that they do
not stop being Christians or Catholics when they leave our house. I want their
values to be grounded on the reason that they want to be holy and good just
like our Heavenly Father. I want them not just to live their lives for this
present life but to have an eternal perspective. I want them to be good to
their playmates and classmates not only because that is expected of them by
society but mainly because that is what Jesus asks us (His followers) to do.
After
listening to the two school owners discuss the coverage of their programs or
curriculum, I realized that it’s still a challenge to place my son in a
brick-and-mortar school whether it’s progressive or traditional… especially, if
it’s traditional. My son could get bored in a number of subjects where he is
quite fast for his age. He could also get stressed when he is forced to do
exercises or worksheets he isn’t fond of doing. This could present not only
problems to the child but also to the teacher, knowing that my son would most
likely try to reason his way out of something he doesn’t want to do. Even his
therapists say he has very good negotiation skills. His teacher or the adults
caring for him need to be vigilant. Otherwise, my son could persuade the adult
to do things his way most of the time or to simply follow his agenda. They say
that gifted kids who notice that they can dominate you will not hesitate to
take advantage of that. The problem there is we also need to teach them to
recognize and respect authority figures and to obey when needed.
Because
I wanted to understand my son better, the moment I realized that he’s
potentially-gifted, I started researching more about giftedness and read as
much literature as I could about the topic. I also attended seminars. I joined
a forum of parents who homeschool gifted children. I can confidently say that I
know more about giftedness than the teachers in the schools we visited. Thus, I
know better how to handle my son’s behaviors. Also, because I have observed his
occupational therapists over the years, somehow, I have learned from them.
What’s my son’s verdict?
He
still wants to be homeschooled. He said that he wants to learn through play
still. He also said that he wants his younger brother to be his classmate
instead of the other kids. Upon hearing this from my eldest son, I realized
that he really enjoys learning at home. There’s isn’t much pressure. My husband
and I try to give him a bit of pressure or challenge to help him discover his
potential but not too much to the point that he’ll be developing negative perceptions
about learning. Thank God we have instilled in our kids especially our eldest
the desire to learn and to enjoy the learning process. He is a very inquisitive
child and we do our best to satisfy his curiosity. I also realized that
homeschooling multiple children helps promote better and stronger relationships
between siblings. Since my eldest son is 3 years older than my second child, he
acts as my teacher assistant to his younger brother. And he seems to enjoy it.
The younger child also develops high esteem for his older brother and looks up
to him, wanting to imitate him in many ways.
I
plan to inquire and visit more schools in the future. In the meantime, we will
continue with our homeschool adventure.
Are
you also looking for a school for your small children? I strongly recommend
that you take time to list down your questions and to make time to visit and
observe. Sometimes, what seems good enough is not really good when you examine
it closely. Hope this post helped you in some way.