I didn’t realize I had such powerful influence on my son until last week when my husband pointed out that my son was carrying some items at home like a girl. I didn’t notice right away that when he hang his sando, his dad’s umbrella, his red pail and his bib on his bended arm while waving goodbye on separate occasions that he was actually imitating me. My husband freaked out one night when he witnessed his son doing that. It was only after he pointed that out that I remembered that that’s how I usually carry my bag and wave my hand to say goodbye whenever I leave the house and Yanthy stays behind.
Then, I started to take stock of what else he has picked up from me. Well, he wrinkles his nose when he smells something bad. He must have seen that when I take off his soiled diapers from him and clean his poop. These past months, he has imitated some of the dance moves I showed him. He has learned to raise his hand after I call out his full name to signify that he is present. He’s affectionate and sometimes surprises us by suddenly kissing us on the cheeks or lips. He has learned to imitate me when I vocalize. He has learned to hum and shake his rattle whenever music is played on the stereo. He babbles as he turns the pages of his books as if he’s reading. And he sometimes “sings” to himself when he’s sleepy and about to fall asleep. He puts his hands together to pray before eating and wipes his mouth with his bib. He has an eye for dirt and wants to pick up those that he sees scattered around even when outside the house. He imitates the sounds of animals that I introduced to him -- the latest of which is the chicken.
Having realized how strongly my actions leave an imprint on my son’s mind, I now commit to be extra careful especially when I do some girl stuff. I remember my friend Tina who mentioned to me in the past that she doesn’t let her sons see or watch her put on make-up. I have decided to do the same and to consciously carry my bag in a different way now when I leave the house and say goodbye to my son.
But these are not the only things I have resolved to do. I also realized how important his dad’s presence is in molding his personality and character. We must really make sure that our son spends ample and quality time with his dad so that he would not only take on my traits but also that of his dad. I want my son to develop manly character. This would not happen if he gets to spend all of his time with me. So, just like tonight, I’ll leave the two of them more time to bond without me in the picture so that my husband would also have a powerful influence on our son.